Myths and Magic

As I speak to my special parents, I encounter many myths, especially about Autism. Recently ABC News recently published 10 Myths About Autism. These include:

• There is an epidemic of Autism (I believe, as do the experts, that we are having some increase through better diagnosis, and even some over-diagnosis.)
• Autism can be cured (If you're "cured", you probably didn't have it to begin with.)
• Autism is the result of cold and unfeeling parents (Probably the most untrue of the bunch!)
• Individuals with Autism always have hidden or exceptional talents (OK, this one I agree with, but I think all my students have hidden talents!)
• Repetitive or ritualistic behaviors should be stopped (Not always, depends on the behavior and the situation--I pop my neck when I'm tense, and I'm sure you have some repetitive or ritualistic behaviors you do when not in public.)
• Individuals with Autism are unable to build social relationships (Most of my students have at least a few friends, and one screening method I've used in the past is to see if new kiddos seek out the other students with Autism during lunch. Social, but still tells us a lot!)
• Autistic individuals are a danger to society. (No, but those who spread hate are. This is my pick for stupidest myth!)

Others I've been asked:

• If my child is diagnosed with Autism, are you going to put him in the Autism class? (Students who are being successful shouldn't be moved--diagnosis doesn't drive placement, and most schools don't have separate classes based on disabilities.)
• Where did he get it? (Always tempted to answer "Santa!" or "From a Crackerjack box!", but getting fired would be bad. Real answer--born that way!)
• Should I vaccinate my kids? (Can't give medical answers because I'm not a doctor. But all mine were vaccinated.)

But, at this time of year, myths have to give way to magic. I've encountered many students in the past who had never given anyone a Christmas gift that wasn't provided by a parent. After much thought, my students decided they would spend more time thinking about giving than getting. They are giving gift certificates to their parents for various acts of service. This is difficult for any teens, but especially for those on the spectrum. They have to think about what their parents would most enjoy, then sacrifice their time to provide it.

All in all, this experience has turned out to be a little gift for me.

Perspectives

I was feeling sorry for myself today because my family has been hit financially like so many in these tough economic times.

But I waited with a parent while her child went through some extensive testing. We worked through a questionnaire, then visited as we observed her little one through the one-way glass. She, like most mothers, is very worried. Her child doesn't act or speak like most peers. She paid for an outside evaluation (I wish those people would tell parents they can get testing for free from their school district, and that we can't by law accept evaluations done by one person and not a team), and was desperate to have some answers. You could feel the waves of worry coming off her.

As we sat, I was able to reassure her that the team in the other room would do a thorough job. She was able to see how kindly they treated her child. Following the evaluation, we were able to share some recommendations that would be implemented in the classroom, and things she could do at home. She left feeling better than when she came.

I've sat with other parents in similar situations. One lost her job minutes before we met, yet was able to put that aside and focus on her child. Others have frequent visits to the emergency room with their medically fragile offspring.

Somehow financial problems don't seem all that bad.